On Respect

The topic of my choice for my Effective Communication Skill presentation this morning. This is the unedited version.

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Introduction:
“I speak to everyone in the same way, whether he is the garbage man or the president of the university.” The famous German theoretical physicist, also known as the father of modern physics, Albert Einstein once said regarding his treatment for the others. Likewise, Harper Lee, the author of one of my favourite books, To Kill a Mockingbird, also understood the importance of respects for all humankind when he wrote, “As you grow older, you’ll see white men cheat black men every day of your life, but let me tell you something and don’t you forget it – whenever a white man does that to a black man, no matter who he is, how rich he is, or how fine a family he comes from, he is a trash.”
A very good morning to my dear lecturer, Ms Praveena, and all my fellow classmates. Today, I would like to bring to your attention the topic, Respect. First, I would talk about self-respect, then, the respect for others. Personally I think the virtue of respect is slowly disregarded in our society today. That’s why we have so many relationship problems – between parents and children, employers and employees, and etc. Hence, I’d like to make this speech a reminder for myself and also for all of you, to bring Respect back into your daily life.  

Body:
Self-respect:
First and foremost, self-respect. Self-respect simply means respect for oneself. Ah you don’t say? Definition always bores me out so instead of giving you a long list of how respect is defined, I’m going to give you some hints on how to respect others. 

Think, what it means to respect someone. The qualities we respect vary from person to person. Some respect people with great integrity, some maybe people with more achievements, and others, act of kindness. However, there is also a basic level of respect that most people will agree is a right and does not need to be earned. Here are some widely agreed upon signals of respect: 

·         You don’t steal from, harm, or insult them.
·         You are honest with them.
·         You listen to what they say, consider their opinion and avoid interrupting them.
·         You dress appropriately in front of them.

I have come across a quote that sounds, “If you want to be respected by others, the great thing is to respect yourself. Only by that, only by self-respect will you compel others to respect you.” Whatever you believe to be respect, apply it to yourself. Don’t do things you’d never do to someone you care about to yourself. For instances, you don’t discourage yourself from following your own dreams and you don’t insult yourself. Instead of looking in the mirror saying, “Urgh I am so ugly.” Tell yourself, “Hey, I’m beautiful.” Be completely honest with yourself, develop your own opinions and don’t be afraid to stand by them. You also must take good care of yourself. I believe you don’t want your best friend to fall ill. Similarly, you should not neglect your own health. Getting fit and healthy is one way of respecting your own body.

I’d also advise you to get to know yourself better. Discover your principles, personality, and talents. The more you understand about yourself, the more you’ll see and appreciate how uniquely you are made, and the more you will respect yourself. One thing you should stop doing is to pandering to other people’s approval. Develop your own standards and live up to it.

Be very careful to recognise when people disrespect you. Never allow others to treat you badly. Not your family, not your lover, and not even yourself. If you are a self-respecting individual, chances are you want others to treat you with respect too. You know what, age isn’t a prerequisite nor is it a magic key to gaining respect. I’ve seen plenty of people who are young be highly respected from their elders and I’ve also come across older people who I’d never respect due to their actions that are so out of line. It is about how you conduct yourself, your attitudes towards others and your actions. Therefore, take steps to stop it. Believe that you deserve better and tell those who disrespect you, “You just disrespected me and that’s not acceptable to me. If you don’t respect me, I won’t spend time with you anymore.” Make it clear that you would rather live with dignity and without them instead of being trampled by them. Regardless of your age and position, you can be well respected by the others.

Respect for others
Laurence Sterne once said, “Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners.” Now, let’s move on to the respect for others. Imagine, how would your life be different if you stopped making negative judgemental assumptions about people you encounter? I have heard people who would deliberately use insulting words to mock and make fun of the obsessed, the poor, the uneducated, the disabled and people with special needs e.g. down-syndrome, autism. (Picture 4) Every times, I tell you, I could feel the anger arousing when I hear words as such. Forget not those who say that are often of better educated backgrounds. No one gets to choose the way they are born and nobody have not gone through other people’s lives, so no one can possibly empathise with whatever hardships and torments others have to push through in order to survive. People did not persevere to be held in scorn. Rather, they deserve every bit of your respect. I strongly agree with Thomas Monson when he said, “When we treat people merely as they are, they will remain as they are. When we treat them as if they were what they should be, they will become what they should be.” The power is in your hand. You choose how you are going to treat them. Hereby I would like to challenge every one of you, to look for the good in everyone you meet and to respect their journey.  

Conclusion:
Respect is perhaps the most important element in any successful long-tern relationship other than trust. And that is what we want to develop with our clients and colleagues, family and friends. I like what Fred Rogers has commented regarding the issue, “It’s very dramatic when two people come together to work something out. It’s easy to take a gun and annihilate your opposition, but what is really exciting to me is to see people with differing views come together and finally respect each other.” My dear friends, don’t take respect from others for granted because it cannot be demanded but is earned. Thank you.

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He took away my stage fright and put in me the still-growing confidence. A little bit of nervousness is inevitable but I'm sure each next time would be so much better than the last time. 

Thank you, Lord! 

1 comment:

Unknown said...

nice one! :):)